NAdvice in Islam
Islam positions advice as a fundamental right that one Muslim owes to another, endowing it with significant value. The Sharia (Islamic law) outlines the rewards and benefits associated with giving and receiving advice. Quranic verses and prophetic traditions emphasize the necessity of mutual counsel and cooperation among Muslims, promoting the commandment of good and the prohibition of wrongdoing. Allah states: (And cooperate in righteousness and piety, but do not cooperate in sin and aggression. And fear Allah; indeed, Allah is severe in punishment). Furthermore, it is essential to adhere to certain guidelines and etiquettes when offering advice, as this not only yields positive outcomes for both the advisor and the advisee but also contributes positively to the wider community.
Etiquettes of Offering Advice in Islam
There are specific etiquettes that an advisor should observe, which are crucial for effective advice. Below, we outline these essential principles.
1. Avoid Public Advising
Presenting advice publicly can lead to feelings of embarrassment for the advisee, resembling a form of reprimand. It is often said that public advice can be tantamount to public humiliation.
2. Offer Advice Gently and Kindly
It is crucial that advice is presented with kindness and compassion, which enhances its receptivity. Allah says: (So by mercy from Allah, [O Muhammad], you were lenient with them. And if you had been rude in speech and harsh in heart, they would have disbanded from about you). Harshness can discourage the advisee and spark defiance. The Prophet Muhammad’s gentle approach towards an Arab who urinated in the mosque exemplifies how kindness can lead to a better understanding and acceptance of advice.
3. Desire Goodness and Reform in Advice
The intent behind advice should not be mere criticism, shaming, or fault-finding. For advice to be acceptable, it must be sincerely intended for the sake of Allah, without seeking praise from others or aiming for arrogance. Additionally, it is vital to avoid misleading or deceiving the advisee when providing counsel.
4. The Advisor’s Patience
It is essential for the advisor to embody good character, exhibiting patience in the face of any backlash or resistance. The advisor may encounter insults or reproaches, and it is important to respond with composure and refrain from retaliating.
5. Knowledge and Practice of the Advice Given
For advice to be effective and beneficial, the advisor must possess adequate knowledge regarding the topic of advice. Ignorance on the advisor’s part can lead to numerous complications. Moreover, the advisor should practice what they preach; Allah condemns those who advocate good but fail to enact it themselves, stating: (O you who have believed, why do you say what you do not do? Great is the hatred in the sight of Allah that you say what you do not do).
6. Choose Appropriate Time and Place for Advising
Selecting the right moment and setting for advice is crucial for better acceptance. A wise believer carefully considers when and where to offer counsel, avoiding moments of anger or tension and using the most fitting approach suitable for the situation at hand.
7. Be Concise in Offering Advice
Clarity and brevity are essential, as excessive elaboration may bore or irritate the advisee. Abdullah ibn Mas’ud (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that he would remind people every Thursday. When asked to offer reminders daily, he replied that he wished to avoid burdening them and preferred to ease them into reminders, as the Prophet (peace be upon him) did, to prevent boredom.