What Are the Etiquettes for Visiting Graves?
When visiting graves, Muslims should observe certain etiquettes. Below are some key points to consider:
Praying for the Deceased and Greeting Them
It has been narrated by Al-Bara’ ibn ‘Azib that the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) instructed his companions: “When you visit the graves, say: ‘Peace be upon you, O inhabitants of the grave, from among the believers and Muslims. Indeed, we will join you, if Allah wills. I ask Allah to grant us and you well-being.'” Allah has promised a reward for those who pray for the deceased according to the prescribed prayers in Islam; it is also sufficient to ask for their forgiveness.
Avoid Sitting on Graves
Abu Huraira reported that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “It is better for one of you to sit on a burning ember that burns his clothes and reaches his skin than to sit upon a grave.” Visiting graves is intended for the purpose of praying for the deceased; sitting on a grave is considered disrespectful and is thus discouraged.
Avoid Walking on Graves
Bishr ibn Ma’bad reported that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “I was walking with the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) when he passed by the graves of Muslims. He remarked that they had preceded us in much evil, and when he passed by the graves of the polytheists, he said they had preceded us in much good. At that moment, he noticed a man walking on the graves in his sandals and called out: ‘O you with the two sandals, take them off!’
Avoid Designating Specific Days for Visits
Designating specific days for visiting graves, such as Eid or Friday, or the so-called ‘fortieth day’ after a person’s death, is not permissible in Islam.
Avoid Seeking Intercession through the Deceased
Visiting graves with the intention of seeking intercession through the deceased, or asking for assistance or forgiveness from them, is prohibited. This practice is considered an innovation and can even amount to major shirk (associating partners with Allah). As stated in the Qur’an: “And they worship besides Allah that which neither harms them nor benefits them; and they say, ‘These are our intercessors with Allah.'” (Qur’an 10:18)
Avoid Traveling Solely for the Purpose of Visiting Graves
Traveling specifically to visit graves is considered an impermissible act and is reminiscent of the practices of the pre-Islamic period. The Prophet (peace be upon him) warned against this when he said: “Do not set out on a journey except to three mosques: this mosque of mine, the Sacred Mosque, and the Al-Aqsa Mosque,” indicating that travel should be directed only to these three sacred sites.