The Phenomenon of Singleness
Singleness refers to individuals, both women and men, who have reached adulthood without marrying. This commonly used term describes those who have surpassed the typical marriage age recognized in various cultures. While some may mistakenly believe this term exclusively applies to women, it is, in fact, applicable to both genders. This phenomenon arises from a complex interplay of several factors, which we will explore in the following sections.
Causes of Singleness
The Education of Women
Many young women choose to postpone marriage until they have completed advanced degrees such as a Master’s or Doctorate. Once they achieve these educational milestones, they may reject marriage proposals from partners with lower educational qualifications, either due to feelings of superiority or fears of being mistreated. This hesitation may also stem from concerns that a less-educated partner could potentially undermine their sense of achievement. Simultaneously, many men may avoid relationships with educated women for similar reasons, fearing that their partners will appear aloof or condescending.
Economic Challenges
A significant number of young individuals face economic difficulties that serve as major barriers to marriage. Issues such as unemployment, high housing prices, and escalating wedding costs contribute to a drastic reduction in marriage opportunities, as many young men find themselves unable to shoulder such financial burdens.
Migration and Foreign Marriages
Many young individuals migrate abroad in search of employment or education, often leading them to settle in foreign countries and marry women from different cultural backgrounds. This trend is frequently driven by the lower costs of marriage in these contexts or for practical purposes, such as acquiring citizenship in their new country.
Behavioral Deviations Among Youth
It has become increasingly common for young men and women to engage in relationships that do not align with societal norms, making traditional marriage seem less urgent. Furthermore, societal acceptance of older men marrying significantly younger women further complicates the issue. Concurrently, exposure to Western cultural influences has led some young women to adopt revealing clothing and embrace mixed-gender social interactions, potentially deterring men from pursuing marriage with such individuals. Many men prefer to marry someone who aligns more closely with their traditional values.
The Impact of Family Reputation
Many young women grapple with the negative reputations of their families, which can hinder potential marriage prospects. Concerns about a partner’s reputation can cause apprehension among men, especially if they fear that marrying into a family with a problematic history could reflect poorly on them.
Unrealistic Expectations in a Partner
A number of women create an idealized image of their future spouse, leading them to dismiss all suitors. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) advised that women should choose husbands based on religious and moral character. He said: “If a man comes to you whose religious commitment and character you are pleased with, then marry him. If you do not do this, there will be trial in the land and extensive corruption.” This principle, however, seems to be overlooked by some who set unattainably high standards.
Interference from Guardians
In some instances, families prevent their daughters from marrying suitable partners due to various motivations, often rooted in financial considerations. These guardians may seek higher dowries by encouraging their daughters to marry more affluent suitors or wish to retain the financial benefits they derive from their daughters’ employment. Such practices are deemed contrary to ethical and legal standards in marriage.