Legal Rulings for Married Couples
Marriage was ordained by the Creator – may He be exalted – as a means for humanity’s continuity on Earth, enabling individuals to fulfill their roles in cultivating and stewarding the land, as well as achieving servitude to God – may He be exalted. In Islamic jurisprudence, there are specific rulings that govern various aspects of married life, including provisions related to the wedding night and marital relations. The following points highlight some of these rulings:
Rulings on the Wedding Night
Here, we outline some of the legal rulings regarding the wedding night as discussed by Muslim scholars:
- The exchange of affection and enjoyment is permissible between spouses immediately upon the conclusion of the marriage contract. This encompasses living together under one roof, while enjoyment refers to both physical and emotional pleasure between the partners, which is a lawful right for both parties.
- It is recommended for the husband on the wedding night to place his hand on his wife’s head and make supplications for her. Additionally, prior to intimacy, he should perform miswak (a method of teeth cleaning), to purify his mouth, along with invoking God’s name and praying during the act of intimacy, as well as engaging in gentle affection before the act.
Rulings on Marital Relations
Marital relations come with specific laws and traditions that should be observed in accordance with the teachings of the Prophet Muhammad – peace be upon him. Some of these rulings include:
- It is permissible for a husband to have intercourse with his wife in any part of her body, with the exception of anal intercourse.
- Intercourse during a woman’s menstrual period is prohibited.
- If a man has the capacity and desires to engage in intimacy again, it is recommended that he perform ablution before doing so.
- A wife is not permitted to refuse intimacy when her husband requests it without a legitimate excuse.
- If a man returns from a journey, he should not surprise his wife but rather inform her of his expected arrival time.
- Neither spouse is allowed to disclose private matters and secrets related to their intimacy.
Rights of the Husband and Wife
Islam, with its lenient laws and wise teachings, provides provisions aimed at safeguarding the rights of both spouses, ensuring justice, and fostering affection and mercy between them. Key points include:
Husband’s Rights
Islam commands the wife to uphold her husband’s rights and to fulfill them diligently so that both can attain happiness and secure God’s pleasure. These rights include:
- Obedience in accordance with what is good
The obedience of a wife to her husband takes precedence over others, provided that it does not conflict with God’s commands; thus, the wife is in a state of worship, leading towards Paradise. However, she must not obey in matters of disobedience, as there is no obedience to a creation in disobedience to the Creator.
- Kindness and good treatment towards the husband
The wife should actively seek to bring joy to her husband and show concern for him. The life of Prophet Muhammad – peace be upon him – serves as an exemplary model, particularly regarding his wife Khadijah’s support after his initial revelations in the Cave of Hira.
- Moderation in jealousy.
- Safeguarding his honor, wealth, and children during his presence and absence, as she is entrusted with these responsibilities.
- The wife should not leave the house without her husband’s permission.
Wife’s Rights
The wife possesses several rights that must not be neglected or undermined in any way. These rights include:
- The husband must provide his wife with her financial rights, such as the dowry, maintenance, and care.
The dowry is a specific right for women according to both the Quran and Sunnah; as stated in the Quran: “And give the women [upon marriage] their [bridal] gifts graciously.” Additionally, numerous texts encourage fulfilling these rights and caution against neglecting them.
- Kind treatment in domestic life
This entails maintaining a pleasant atmosphere, refraining from causing harm, and promptly fulfilling obligations without showing reluctance. The husband should express kindness and generosity towards his family, avoiding any notions of entitlement or harm, all of which fall under the category of what is known and encouraged by God, who says: “And live with them in kindness.”
- Consistent good treatment of the wife, always striving for fairness and steering clear of injustice.
- If the husband has multiple wives, he must ensure equity in accommodation and maintenance among them.
Shared Rights Between Husband and Wife
Both partners share several rights and legal provisions, including:
- The right to intimacy
This implies the mutual responsibility of both husband and wife to fulfill each other’s needs adequately.
- The right to live in kindness
True happiness and peace for a believer can only be attained when households are built on mutual kindness, love, and affection. This right has been mandated by God – the Exalted – for its profound impact on the welfare and joy of both partners.